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February 19, 2004
I'm Half Spanish; See, I Cook Coke for Goya
I'm happy that God gave the world Mexican cuisine, because it's one of the few reliable staples here on earth. If you've got tacos, you're happy. Better yet, if you've got chicken quesadillas--holy crap, you're all set. Aside from the chance of getting heartburn and Montezuma's Revenge, what's not to like?
Unfortunately, here in Ohio, we're pretty much regulated to sampling the likes of Taco Bell, Don Pablo's, Chipotle, and Baja Fresh (We used to have a Chi Chi's nearby, but I think they closed that after someone realized they were dealing cocaine somewhere in parking lot). A "taco" in Mideastern English pretty much translates to a spot of ground beef thrown upon a hard flour tortilla made someplace in northern Michigan. There isn't much room for authenticity here. I used to feel sorry for Alina when she'd complain about the ingredients that made up cafeteria's "Spicy Chicken Enchiladas," which was basically the school's description of a diced chicken breast doused in some off-brand Pace Picante sauce.
"Ayyy, they ruin everything," she shrugged nonchalantly. "I'm used to it now, though. Everything here is just a pathetic Tex-Mex version of what it really is."
I guess this is partly true... Just off campus, there's a restaurant called "Taco Ninja," which supposedly infuses the best parts of Mexican and Japanese culture in their fast food delivery. They advertise in all the Valu-Right coupon booklets, and feature an overmuscluar ninja chowing down on what looks like a tofu infused burrito. "The Taco Ninja has vowed to vanquish all hunger," the copy reads. "Don't be weak! Order from the Taco Ninja and assassinate your hunger today!"
...I don't know about you, but I think they're missing something here.
Today's Soundtrack: "Nothin'," N.O.R.E.
Best Part of the Day: Argumentative Republican looks absolutely hot with his hair cut.
PS: "Assassinate" is a difficult word to spell off the top of your head. Ass+Ass+In+Ate. Hard stuff.
PPS: You guys have to make sure to vote for my site for this quarter's Diarist Awards (Don't vote more than once though, or else it'll be discarded)!
posted at 4:48 p.m.
