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June 11, 2003
No Sex In the Champagne Room
A little more than ninety minutes ago, I sat in the astronomy conference room, ready to take my last astronomy exam EVER. I can't tell you just how elated and saddened I am at the same time. That exam meant no more late nights spent pouring over notes about RR Lyraes and Cepheids... Or memorizing the formation of barred spiral galaxies and their Population I O2V stars. It also meant that I wouldn't ever get to spend the week with awesome professors like Dr. DePoy ("It's like, this big-assed telescope! There's crazy shit everywhere!"), or have any additional late night study breaks with David on the fifteenth floor. Oh God--it also means no more studying with Mark on the fifteenth floor, so I guess the pros outweigh the cons.
Anyway, since there was some environmental group meeting in our usual classroom, we all had to take the exam in the conference room on the fourth floor. I ended up sitting at this crooked table with this nearly silent girl at my right (The only thing I really know about her is the "Starry Night" bag she carries around with her day after day. Other than that, she'd be unnoticable.), and Nick and Rachel at the table behind me. I started pulling out the usual pencils, erasers and calculator when I heard the following conversation coming from behind me:
Nick: So I was taking a shower this morning--because you know how I like to do that in the morning, right? I got up from my bed and took all my stuff into the bathroom, and starting running the water and everything... Typical shower, right?
Rachel: Yeah...?
Nick: And so I'm lathering and rinsing, and doing my usual thing... When all of a sudden, I hear the curtains open in the shower next to me, with all this giggling. And I'm standing in my shower, washing and everything when I realize that my suitemate and his girlfriend have just climbed in there and have started having sexual intercourse. (Leave it to Nick to say "sexual intercourse" instead of just plain "sex.")
Rachel: Omigod! Did they know you were in there?!
Nick: No... But they were making all these noises and everything. They weren't quiet about it at all. I mean, it'd be a different thing if they had been in the shower first, and then I came in later. I'd have been like, "Whoa, need to step back here," you know? But they knew I was in there and they decided to do it anyway. I was there first. It would have been totally different if I'd walked in on them.
Rachel: Oh, of course. Did you say anything?
Nick: No, but I might as well have. I mean, I was in on the whole thing, I should have said, "Mind if I join you?" and seen what happened. I mean, there I was, washing myself in the shower--a normal thing to do--and they're busy having sexual intercourse in the other stall. So I just hurried up dried myself off so I could get out of there. I didn't bother saying anything about it.
Now if that doesn't beat Ugly Alison throwing up in our bathroom, I don't know what does.
Today's Soundtrack: "No Sex in the Champagne Room," Chris Rock
Best Part of the Day: School is OVER!
posted at 3:09 p.m.
