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December 19, 2006
Unemployment or Bust
So, I have unofficially had The First Real Job for about three weeks, and I have nothing to show for it.
No start date, no contracts signed, no benefits, no paychecks, no prenuptial agreement.
Zip. Nada. Zilch. Nothing. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.
According to my Unofficially-Official Boss (UOM), this period of limbo is a direct result of the over-saturation of new hires thrown at the human resources department. I'm basically waiting for some corporate yahoos to do a credit and background check on me so that they can wave their official magic hiring wands and allow my negro butt in the door.
But seriously... why so long? This whole interview process started at the beginning of November, and here we are moving in into muthafrickin' January.
Dad says they're stalling until they can get me at the start of the new fiscal year. But still--a start date would be nice. Schedules have already been drafted for next month/year at The Upscale Retail Job, and I've been asked if I'm ready to give my two weeks' notice. I told The Skinny One to keep me full time until around the second week of January, when I can (hopefully) be onto my next gig. But I'm still scared that I might been out the door for a few weeks without having a paying job; what if the HR people find something wrong with my work history and decide not to give me approval? Or what if they're just all-around slackers who never get around to calling me back until February?
I'm screwed.
I've called my UOM twice since last Friday and left voicemail messages, but they haven't been returned. I'm betting that she's either taken a Christmukah Vacation, or she's become even more sick since I spoke to her last (As of two Fridays ago, she had come down with strep throat). I'd be nice if she'd at least sent one of her flying monkeys to return my phone calls, then I wouldn't feel the need to bite my nails incessantly out of nervousness.
Of course, all of this waiting gives me time to keep my fingers crossed about the possibility of a new job with a certain well-known network that I will only describe as the Quality Liberal Programming Channel (or "QLP," for short). In school, I worked at a local QLP for nearly two years, and loved it, but working for the national headquarters, sheesh. It's not as starry and dreamy as the production assistant gig with MegaStudio, but it's still very substantial. Besides all that, it'd mean I'd get an excuse to move out of the confines of my family and the Midwest in general.
I had a phone interview, and I'm still waiting to hear from QLP about a second interview, at which point, I would have to travel and meet all of this great, intellectual liberals in person. But that job opening isn't until the middle of January/February, so I've still got some waiting to do.
Keep your fingers crossed for me.
posted at 12:02 p.m.
